Sunday, January 8, 2012

The Sunday Salon

Happy New Year! I’ve been a bit busy this past week; I began re-watching the first season of Downton Abbey in preparation for the premiere of the second season this evening in the US! I have been geeking out about this all week in the most insane way. I took the Downton Abbey personality quiz and it turns out that I’m Anna Smith, the head housemaid, but I think there’s a certain amount of Edith in there as well.

In reading, I finished They Knew Mr. Knight this week and embarked on Nella Last’s War this weekend. The problem I have at the beginning of the ear always is that there's so much possibility with every book I own that it's tough to decide what to read next!

On a non-book-related note, for the past couple of months I’ve been giving online dating a whirl. It can be so difficult to write a profile that’s meaningful and connects with someone, especially since most dating profiles are mere shadows of who we really are. Like job applications and cover letters, people really only spend a couple of seconds looking at a dating profile, so it’s important to get things right. So many of the profiles I’ve seen are so riddled with clichés that it makes me wonder if these guys really know what they’re about, or if they’re just saying what they think we women want to hear. Some of my favorite clichés and deal breakers include:

1) “I’d like a girl who’s just as comfortable staying in wearing sweats and a tee shirt as they are in a cocktail dress.” Ugh, it hurts my fingers to even type this one.
2) “I’m as comfortable going out as I am staying at home with a movie and a bottle of red.” Ever notice how it’s never a bottle of white?
3) “I’m very sarcastic/spontaneous/laid back/up for anything, etc,” but then they don’t actually give any examples. This goes for any adjective someone uses to describe themselves. As my former English teachers used to say, “show, don’t tell.” And if you have to say that you’re any of these things, you probably aren’t. Jus’ saying’.
4) “I’m a Romeo looking for my Juliet.” Well, a sweet sentiment except for one tiny detail. I don’t know if you’ve ever read or seen the play, but personally I’m not in the habit of committing suicide over my boyfriends’ corpses.
5) “No games.” So what happened in your past that makes you say this? Goes along with the request for “drama free.”
6) Opening with “I was in a relationship for 5 years and just got out 3 months ago.” OK, probably not over his ex, no?
7) Photos of someone shirtless./taking a photo of themselves through a mirror. Don’t get me started on this one.
8) Many guys mention that they like the show It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Well, I had to look that one up and found that it’s an incredibly stupid show featuring incredibly stupid people based around a city we happen to live in.
9) “I’m just looking for friends.” Umm, no you’re not; you’re on a DATING website, for crying out loud!
10) People who say they hate writing about themselves. Don’t we all.
11) Saying something like, “so here’s the uninteresting story of my life.” Well, since you’re clearly not interested in your life, why should I be?
12) “My friends and family say that I’m…” I don’t want to hear what your friends and family think about you; I want to hear about what you think of you!
13) “I’m looking for my partner in crime.” Ugh.
14) “I don’t really read all that much.” A deal breaker for yours truly if ever there was one.

As far as any of these clichés go, I just want to close that profile and move on to the next! If you’ve ever tried online dating, what was your experience? Got any stories to tell?

Happy New Year! What are you reading?

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